- You know your day has peaked when you find yourself trying to plug the iPhone end of the USB cable into the back of your iMac. #
- Worse is when you pick up a call and hold said phone wrong way up and proceed to exhort your caller to *speak up.* #
- Even after much complaining and this tweet, i am unhappy to report that i still do not have this New Twitter. http://bit.ly/9S7r7F #
- Is it just me or is my circle of comics the last to be issued New Twitter.
I wish to assure @Twitter that we are smarter than we appear. # - Me? Nothing. Just killing a spider in my car in traffic. Screaming… Sorry scaring it with war cries like a Ninja.
Oh the indignity! # - Move it along, nothing to see here. #
- I should probably not be using this brand new smartphone my significant other bought me yesterday. http://www.juju.co.ke #
- Phone for sale. Brand new. Might come pre-installed with juju.co.ke software. That is offered free, license free. #
- Just had a lovely evening with an equally lovely lady and no one attacked me with a club so I would call it a success. #
- I think there is something in my closet, i am too afraid to go look in there and find out what it is.
It might want to *come out*. # - When I see so many favs and my tweet makes it quickly onto the NSFW leaderboard I suspect that I shall be getting invoices in my DM. #
- Listening to 'Eye of the Tiger' should be illegal.
An attempt to dance to it will warrant being dispatched with a pistol grip shotgun. # - Ever since I joined Twitter I haven't looked at the Canadian *Mounted* Police quite the same way again. #
- Strange that muffin tops discourage persons who would otherwise heartily eat your muffin. #
- Give me a minute while I spam everyone I know on safaricom with meaningless texts. #
September, 2010 Monthly archive
- Wait, so if i want to use this BlackBerry PlayBook without a WiFi network i have to buy a BB, pay for BIS then pair via Bluetooth? No. #
- PlayBook(s) for PlayMate(s). #
- On my 'To Do' list today is 'to do a To Do list.' #
- I am beginning to suspect that i am the only one who still hasn't got this 'New Twitter' y'all are complaining about.
Is it an STD? # - I am special, how else do you explain things like running out of stars? #
- I always tuck my trousers into my socks before getting getting into the driver's seat.
What do you mean this is not like a bicycle? # - How many 'Favourites' does @Twitter allow per day?
Whatever the number is it seems i exceed them every day. # - Let's go driving. http://twitgoo.com/1p9gkg #
- Mona is a Ninja. Idiot Platz driver almost drives off Valley Road we braked for stupid cop crossing while said was tailgating. #mzeeniwewe #
- At @antoneosoul 's gig With Paragasha Band at Club Soundd. @fivefoottall on the mic soulfying the hell out of the place. #
- My iPhone autocorrects Dec. to sex. Has it been that long, iPhone? #
- I fear that New Twitter shall call when she is already past her prime, saggy bits & all then i will no longer want to make out anymore. #
- #MusicMonday American Anthems 3 CD collection. Gems like Drive – by The Cars. http://bit.ly/9K1pBU (You Tube) #
- Don't ever say 'bite me' to a Vampire. Those guys do not have a sense of humour.
Unrelated: OW! # - Wedding Bands have nothing to do with those fellows who you hire to come sing at your wedding. Who knew! #
- Say what now?
Oh, he is *named* Cockrin?
I thought you had said something entirely different. # - Now look, i was about to suggest a prank involving posting 'on mouseover' meme Tweets just so as to fuck with people then i chickened out. #
- Being passive aggressive is so a talent. #
- Wow! Dude just got clocked with a walking stick! "what do you say?" "yes sir." #
- If Zain or Airtel Bharti don't stop with their fuckery with my Internet connection I may be obliged to show them a close up of their colon. #
- Some grow older, some wiser, this one just gets crazier. Happy new year @Kahenya. May you grow horns or something related, you are a gem. #
- #NowPlaying Wherever you will go – The Calling.
If i could then i would, i would go wherever you will go…. *and you know i will* #
- The trousers are off.
Now, where is this Sunday evening i give it a proper seeing to? # - Why Black Market? That I fear is entirely racist! #
- Where can I get the unedited audition tapes for Nairobi? #tpf4 #
- I am suing! That one just broke my glass. #tpf4 #
- Facepalm @makmende. #tpf4 #
- Someone please stomp on this one for me please. #tpf4 #
- Oh @ianmbugua making out with a contestant on stage. #tpf4 #
- What the hell? This 50 cent wanna be. #tpf4 #
- Someone give Rihanna here a pole. I have a 50 bob for her. #tpf4 #
- Lady in green for president! #tpf4 #
- The Ugandans entertain us next weekend. See you all here. @bazanye did you go audition? #
- You #tpf4 #chukiFM lot were in great form tonight. I expect you all here next week to put lols in my my chest and stuffs. #
- I am not a morning person, then again I am not much for days or nights either. #
- Again with the noses, I am quite concerned about yours since it always seems to be running and leaving all the smelling to the feet. #
- Today is one of those days you pick up your mobile when it rings and ask your caller, "how did you know that I would be here?" #
- I thought I would let Dexter fans know that he is back for Season 5. Or that Season 5 is back in season. Or something. #
- I applaud the indefatigability of those who, even with better judgement, still continue to follow me on Twitter, worse yet, Retweet me. #
- 1. Coffee. My assistant bested me this morning on a task i usually beat her at, hands down.
2. Learning how to relax at work; tense is bad. #
